Image by Kate Miller-Wilson
I was going to write a few days ago but my period arrived with pomp and pageantry and there went my zest for life. I feel like that last statement is a complete post by the way. I miss the days when it arrived like a thief in the night! Trying to sneak up on me and be cute but nope, now it heralds its arrival with bells and whistles like a train arriving at a station, the marching band bumping along just behind.
Oh well, I survived it with lots of turmeric and beetroot remedies. I’ve been trying the natural route for pain and discomfort as prescribed by the lover man ;-). After taking medications and steroids for over a year, I need my liver to be great again; hence, the natural route. Turmeric is amazing for inflammation and eases blood flow while Beetroot - a powerhouse of iron, calcium and folic acid reduces water retention and bloating amongst other benefits. Please do not take my word for it, make google your bestie and research, you’d be amazed at what you find. I’d do a post on what I tried when I wanted to shrink my fibroids organically - This will be a hilarious post, I am already chuckling. That said, I caved in on day two and swallowed Neurofen. I needed a quick fix and the thought of grating or boiling anything aggravated my PMS please.
On to the business of the day, Today I am honoured to share Amaka’s journey with you all. When I started conceptualizing writing this compendium, I knew Amaka’s story would be the first I told. It was an easy thought because she is one of my oldest friends and the first person I ever witnessed in severe distress over periods. I should add that her story is heavy but such is the journey of most of our wombs. I write it as I recall it but I also asked her permission and more details so here goes.
I have an image in my head of Amaka writhing in pain on the floor when we were in secondary school. I have never been able to forget it. We were probably about twelve or thirteen years of age and our journeys to womanhood had just started. It was an exciting time if you just got your periods or had a semblance of breast. Well that is not how it begins for Amaka. It starts with pain, hot searing pain from the onset. Amaka will be finally diagnosed with Endometriosis at age seventeen.
I lost touch with her for years as she went away for medical school in Cuba but when she returns, fully fledged eclectic doctor, she is now on a new journey of Ovarian Cysts. At this time we are in our Mid twenties. Look it was hard, If I started my journey on team organic now, Amaka has lived her entire life on that spectrum. Visiting her home was like visiting a laboratory. I never saw one fizzy drink in my life in their fridge, matter of fact you are most likely to be offered Aloe vera juice as a welcome drink than water. Man I hated that shit. Her mother put the fear of God in us all with her concoctions, phew. Love you mummy, in case you are reading this. Lol!
Of course the solution to this problem medically is go and have a baby. Sigh. The medical field is quite lazy about finding a useful solution to women’s health issues. It’s not my words alone o, Amaka thinks the same and she’s a doctor of great repute so you see. Have a baby, have a baby, have a baby…Raise your hand if you have been told to have a baby to resolve your women’s health issue? I can bet my left breast that a lot of hands went up. Put it down o jare, baby will not solve anything let me just tell you for free and save you stress. I know people living with worse pains post taking this idea to the labour room.
Anyway, I digress. The cysts were wrongfully diagnosed endometriosis after a thorough examination by the way and thus Amaka begins fertility treatment to have a baby. Many failed IVF’s later, she embarks on a laparoscopy and gets the definitive diagnosis - severe endometriosis. We knew this already, but thank you very much. Chances of carrying a baby on her own? Near impossible. I know how hard this period was for her, I watched my friend become somebody I didn’t know, physically, mentally and all ways. IVF takes a toll on the body like no other treatment. My goodness, so imagine being pumped full of hormones multiple times and all the prodding and poking yet not the desired outcome. It was so hard to watch yet alone live through it but she always had a smile on her face, always hopeful, a true warrior.
The last straw is the proverbial phrase but really this was not a straw, it was the last bang - an awakening. In 2017, her body shut down; complications of endometriosis which led to an intestinal obstruction. A twelve hour surgery was carried out where her colon was so traumatized it had to be removed and placed in a surgical bag, attached outside her body so it could get a break. I saw it with my own eyes. I was distraught. Then after a month, another surgery to place it back inside. She underwent three major surgeries in six months. I write this tearful, can you imagine the scars, I have seen those too.
Please we can take a moment to pause and just celebrate the strength of a woman. You are exceptionally beautiful, you are worthy and not in a L’oreal commercial cutesy way but my God, you are worthy!!
I am happy my friend is still here, living and loving. She has given me a gorgeous baby girl as God daughter, adopted but no less loved. I asked her, What do you want people to take out of your journey? In her words “You are not being hysterical or dramatic when you are in pain on your periods, the pain is not in your head” Endometriosis is hard to diagnose since routine ultrasound scans do not catch it. If you have chronic pelvic pain that disrupts your normal life, investigate it and finally, some women are lost in the fire, some are built from it. I am who I am because of the journey I have lived. Such stellar words.
I salute you my darling Nwaamaka. Indeed a child is a good thing and you my dear, are an amazing blessing to us all. We celebrate you and your life and thank you for letting me tell your story. I hope I did justice to it. You can all leave your love as well in the comment section and if you need further clarification on anything shared, please email me at nnenna@ourwombs.com and I’d pass along. By the way, we’ve got three medical doctors following closely so maybe we can turn them into our in house counsels. Hi Onyeka, Ije and of course, Amaka. You are on your own if they do not answer you sha.
Don’t forget to share if this spoke to you or you need to encourage someone that we do not walk our life’s path alone. That would be all, Bye for now, and have a splendid weekend ahead.
The strength of a woman. Going through all that and still standing! ❤
Oh wow!!! The strength of a woman! Nicely written too...